Weds 3/21

Peer Review of Paper 1: “My Goal”

By today, you should have your final draft of at least 600 words posted on your own personal blog.

A) Discussion of Revision and Peer Review (20 Min)

B) First, on your OWN essay you will do a few things to make this project easier on your potential reviewers (20 Min)

1. Make sure the link to your blog on our course blog works!
2. Open the blog post to edit and put your thesis statement in bold or underline it. Now do the same for the topic sentences of each paragraph. Number your paragraphs (“1” For intro, “2” for first body paragraph, etc.)
3. Check to be sure the entry is easily readable (i.e. not too small and not in a “unique” font or odd color).
4. Write a quick “comment” on your own blog letting potential reviewers know what kind of feedback you feel is especially important to you.

C). REVIEW #1 (1 hour)
For your first assigned peer review:
Answer each of the following questions as a comment on the person’s blog. Be sure to respond in a thorough, helpful and in-depth way by providing examples and concrete suggestions. You are helping your classmate succeed, so do not be afraid of providing good feedback, even if some of the things you point out are things that need to be strengthened. You must use the ENTIRE time!!!
Remember, you will be graded on the quality of your feedback.

D) Wrap up and reading the comments. Be sure to THANK the person for their efforts!!!

E) (at home) use these comments in your final revision. You do not have to take the reviewer’s advice, but please consider each suggestion before choosing to accept or reject it.


Peer Review Questions to Answer

Before answering these question, please read the entire essay!

1. Write a paragraph describing the strongest aspects of this essay.


Intro Paragraph:

2. Is the thesis crystal clear? Y N
3. Is it one sentence (not more or less) and a statement rather than a question? Y N
4. How could the thesis be strengthened?
5. Is there any “attention getting” aspect to the intro and how could it be improved (or can you suggest any ideas if there isn’t one?):
6. Is there a clear “essay map”? Could it be improved?
7. Do the elements provided in the “essay map” line up exactly with the topics of the body paragraphs (and are they in the same order)?
8. Is there any extra “fluff”/filler or other “warm up” generic stuff in the intro that should be cut? Please identify it for the writer.

Body Paragraphs – Repeat for each body paragraph:

9. Is topic sentence clear? Y N
10. Does it obviously relate to and support the thesis? Y N
11. How could it be strengthened?
12. Do details adequately support the topic sentence? If not, give suggestions.
13. Is there a nice mix of “kinds” of detail? If not, give suggestions.
14. Are the sentences organized in the strongest possible way? If not, give suggestions.
15. Is clarification, “connection” or better analysis needed at any point? If so, give suggestions.
Other:
16.Are the body paragraphs in the strongest possible order? Would you suggest rearranging them? How?